A Journey... Again!

So I’m writing this while waiting for the aurgery. Im due to go down at 11:30 local time,  So yeaterday was travel day, we decided to leave home around 1am when our families had gone to bed. This was so as I wasnt to tired to drivining at the scheduled 4am we had planned.  We were at heathrow for 3am and ready to go. The airport was fine a little boring but what do you expect when your 6 hours early for your flight!  Then to Egypt! Even as we came into land the country looked old school. Now once we were picked up, the drive to the hospital was an experience! For a couple of says before coming I had this fear that I may die. If it was going to happen it would be this drive! The roads are crazy! No such thing as lanes or order! Every body just weaves in and out depending how fast your going!  Fortunately we survived! Emad was lovely, he checked us in to the hospital and took us down to the laboratory for blood tests. Then accompanied a porter to take us to our rooms. ...

​ This is difficult writing for a number of reasons. Mainly because by logging into blogging apps it has unearthed my previous blogs. These blogs were at a time I was much happier with my weight. Still very much over weight but very different to where I am in life now!  Never the less I will continue to write and document this process.  My weight has spiralled again, the heaviest I have ever been, and now I intend to do something about it on a more physical basis. In 18 days time I fly to Egypt to have bariatric surgery.  I have decided to document the journey and one day may post it for all to see, This is me, this is my journey

In my family, we offical know its Christmas when the Coca Cola advert airs on TV  However this year didnt have the same affect... For starters its usually aired during a break of xfactor so this year was ruin Lets be honest Rona has a LOT to answer for! But for me Christmas represents the start of newer things... 2018 I weighed just short if 450lbs I had lost 30lbs and was on the way to losing a lot of weight throughout the next year... 2019 I weighed 375lbs a staggering 105lbs weight loss it sounds amazing BUT I was on the way back up.... I had got as low as 347lbs and thought I could manage without tracking Low and behold.. Today I sit at 429lbs But I’m good, I’m working hard, I’m tfacking and have a plan in place for christmas and focus and determination to hit my goal Merry Christmas fuckers 

So 6 weeks have passed and Jamie Alderton’s 6 week santa shred has come to an end.  Now I know I’m not going to be announced as a winner, and I’m cool with that. I overcome fears of posting video’s of me talking to going live to an audience! Although it was only 2 people! 🙈🙈 I finished 3lbs difference to my start weight, however I had slowly increased in weight for the first 5 weeks so this weeks achievements were 7lbs!  I liked Jamie’s style of coaching, his accessibility is second to none and he interacts with anyone who requires it!  I’m hoping to stay in his group and aim to push on with my lifestyle changes! Here’s to another week! 💪🏻💪🏻

So after a few weeks of feeling stagnent I got stuck in the process feeling deflated and like a failure I put out a lengthy post in the JSA group and the to be quite honest the support was fantastic From this one status a couple of people’s comments stood out and made me reflect Mike Redden pointed out - my progess regressed and although I have gained wait I am not where I started I’ve maintained at least a 40lb loss!  Neil Pollock mentioned - comparison is the thief of joy... he then pointed out that this isnt just comparing ourselves to others but also comparing ourself to.... ourselves! The one thing I struggled was how I had progressed last time round How I dropped so much weight last time Now Instead of focusing on what happened before, its about how I can improve this time Its very different circumstances this time around!  Then this comment popped up  Moira hs been how one can only explain as FUCKING INCREDIBLE Moira created an accountabilty spreadsheet, something ...

This week I have been off work for almost two weeks and to be honest I am fucking bored My intentions were to use the time to get back in the gym, something I was struggling with previously My thinking was to go during the day when others are working as its not as busy and I can start to remember why I liked going without the anxiety I create about being there However the national lockdown kicked in, so instead I had two weeks at home and my plans changed and I didnt adapt!  The over powering thought of cupboards full of food while I am counting calories and trying to avoid it all This was emphasised by boredom!!  Having nothing substantial to occupy  my mind led to me struggling! Picking on foods I wouldnt of been ofherwised worried about and needing to reach out for support The mind is a powerful thing and it seems that mine needs to be occupied in order to stop me reaching for food! 

Its time again for Wednesday wisdoms This week I am looking at our relationship wkth the earth! I’m not talkjg about Greta Thunberg and Eco friendly products!! I’m talking about the effect gravity has on us and what we call weight Throughout my weightloss journey I have focused on what the scales say. There was a time I would get caught up on what it said and whether I have lost weight or not. However this has changed How? Well for one I weigh every day, fiest thing in the morning I log each days weights and then I take an average each sunday and compare that to the previous weeks average Why? I do this because I understand that weight changes several times thriughout the day based on so many factors Water retention Bowel movements When I last ate Etc So if I only weigh once a week there is a chance it could be affected by by any one of these factors Here’s an example... Monday I weigh 436 and then the following Monday I weighed 437 So I gained 1lbs right??  WRONG !! Because I took...

Anyone entering into a new lifestyle of tracking food naturally tend to start counting steps.  They go hand in hand We get fitness watches, step counters and debate the best accuracy between fitbit and iWatch There seems to be this daily target of 10,000 steps  We all aim for it... but why? I understand it brings with it a level of effort required to get to that benchmark but for some this requires way more energy than others For example.. Diren Kartel, pioneer of #neatup247 will do 10,000 steps in his sleep!  Watch his stories and he is on the move ALL the time Doing a informative video - he bounces about Cooking - he dances Meeting a friend - he walks Grabbing a coffee - he walks From experience.. my normal daily steps was averaging 2000/3000 at a push aiming for 10,000 would be over 3x my normal movement Would I be able to lift 3x my deadlift PB without prior training? One thing I picked up from James Clear - Atomic Habits is that forming a habit is about 1% at a time ...

This weeks been a decent week I’m on week 5 of the JSA 12 Weeks of Christmas challenge and week 1 of the Santa Shred challenge I havent progressed in 12 WoC challenge as much as I have and I wanted to see why this might be Reflection I checked back through my Insta feed and noticed that I havent been really making myself accountable I stopped writing blogs, I didnt post as much on socials and its obvious the impact this had on my desire to change my life So now I post daily, that's either story or a geid post on insta  I aim to write a weekly round up here and one mid week blog about a subject So here’s to accountability! 

So over a year has passed since I last wrote on here, to be honest I dont think anyone even reads it but its a place to put my thoughts and reflect. My weights increased and I am back at 430ish lbs and miserable! My coat doesnt fit, my chino’s are tight and I refuse to buy anything new. I started the recent JSA challenge and currently finishing week 4, nope maybe 5! Arghhhhh what ever its almost the end of the week!  Anyway, I digress I’ve been back tracking food properly since the start of this challenge and started a 10 day tune up that Jamie Alderton which really engaged me! So I bit the bullet and jumped on board his santa shred challenge. 6 weeks of working along side Jamie and only a week in I can already see the impact its having. He’s really got me to look inside myself from a mental prospective, writing daily jingle journals and taking time to reflect. With this and the help from JSA coach chat with Sinead Quinn, previous winner and PT for JSA she prompted me to think of t...

James has the tough task of going through what are some amazing transformations to pick his winner(s) This was my first challenge and despite what the outcome is I am a winner..  I was always going win. Thats a bold statement to make isn’t it?!  Calling myself a winner when so many others have done incredibly well.  But hear me out... My weight is something I had come to terms with and accepted the fact I was overweight.  I was a happy go lucky person, I’d laugh with friends. Confident and generally happy how I was.. or so I thought.  I started my journey back in November, stumbled across James’s podcasts and then took to JSA. This challenge has given me a target.. something to focus my attention on and a reason to learn and educate myself. Overcoming so many fears during the past 12 weeks and managing to complete so many NSV along the way.  But the main reason I am a winner is that only last week I considered the fact I may not actu...

Only a few weeks ago I started the latest JSA challenge and really focused on weight training I wrote about gym fear and the anxieties it caused just thinking about going to a gym I would sit in the car park for upto an hour Sometimes I would then leave Now we are week 11 of Bali 3.0 and I have changed so much I’m down in weight.. rocking clothes I never thought I would and generally happier in my life Except one thing! I miss going to the gym!!! Yep, thats right! The guy that had extreme gym fear is missing the gym A change in job means I leave the house at 6am and return around 7pm After spening time with the kids, then doing the after dinner chores I find its time for bed Now I find I am missing doing my weights program In attempt yo make time for the gym I have looked at 24 hour gyms locally and turns out there isan anytime fitness right on my door step Equipment looks amazing and I will be able to get a session in before work Yet the thought of changing gym makes me extremely anxi...

This week has been different Despite not getting in the gym until today the weight has literally melted off me Its pretty much basic science but yo be honest I’ve been what can only be described as lazy Until this week my average step count has been around 7000 steps a day I started adding extra walks in the evenings to get additional steps but never really took them higher than 9000 Until this week After starting a new job my steps have rocketed It would appear that lumping parcels around, in and out a van and the occasional bloody sprint to ensure Doris gets her flowers in time all adds up Combine with calorie deficit while still having theoccasional Ginsters means I have now lost over 100lbs Diren Kartel uses NEATUP247 to promote activity and movement A way to get people increasing their energy out by making simple changes Take the stairs instead of the lift Dance like a dick while the tea’s cooking It all adds up And the proof behind it is pictured But on today’s news..  I’d ha...

So this should have been posted last week To be totally honest I forgot I joined JSA after finding James’ podcast and hearing what he had to say Along with the accessibility of his app, the trip he provided layla was what reeled me in I wanted a bit of that.. I hear Bali is rather fetching I was convinced Stuart Cooke was going to win the challenge that was running and I thought..  That could be me I could do with a holiday I assumed that being my size, sticking to CFD and using a training program from JSA I was sure to lose massive amounts of weight and could be a contender Sounds easy doesnt it To be honest if I had done that religiously I think it could be the case But life isn't that way!  Curve ball It has a habit of throwing up changes Things we need to overcome So far I’m 18lbs down during the challenge but to be honest Ive learnt something more valuable than the extra 12lb I was hoping to have lost by now!  Resiliance is what wins Knowing that shit got real Not th...

It has to be said that this week has been the toughest yet! I have struggled on many levels whichhas resulted in my weekly average increasing by 0.5lbs. Is it time to throw in the towel? For many of years I have tried dieting of all forms. And after a week like this I would have given up, hit self destruct and spiralled back to my old ways.  Maybe its time give up.. maybe I have rode the wave and its time to get off. I don’t fuc*ing think so! Today was a lightbulb moment 💡 After feeling shit about how my daily weights had averaged out I took this little beaut for a walk to see the swans 🦢 While out she had a little trip and wanted to be carried back to the car. I carried her for less than 600 fitbit steps.... But had to change her from arm to arm several times, lift her up as she was falling down and my back ached all the way back to the car. 24.5 x 3.5 + 4.25 = 90 Florence weighs 24.5lbs Last November I was carrying 3.5 Florences and an added extra everywhere I went Not just 600...

Always time for Dad... Sometimes I to remind myself if that! Today I have adored, woken by my kids. Breakfast out as a family and then visiting loved ones Even taking a trip to the local cremitorium to lay flowers for those no longer with us With all that said and done I had to remind myself to take the time for me. Getting to the gym andhitting that work out Turned out to be a really good session.. plenty ofsweat, and tears Thats right.... tears!  During my slog on the treadmill I doubted myself, I had forgotten my Why!  I was ready to give up, walk away and make an excuse. But the I remembered... I’ve commited to something, I promised myself to create a better me. To work hard and be proudof my achievements!  So how did I pull myself through? I’ve recently set myself a target, not a weightloss target but something to achieve!  I’m going to do a super sprint triathlon 400m of swimming, 10km of cycling and then 2.5km of running All in one go, at one event This pushed...

As we near the middle of Bali, the buzz maybe fading away... I watched in on the end of Bali 2. And there were some amazing transformations and major buzz about the challenge. I also noticed that there were a fair few people had dropped out for numerous reasons. Am I going to pull out? Will I compete the challnge?  My progress over weeks 3, 4 and 5 weren’t whatI was expecting. However there was a time I would have gone back to old habbits, given up.  This time I have stuck to the process, asked for advice from the group and big boss man. And pushed on through....  Going into week 6, my weight is down and training is going well..  Im pushing PB’s on the weight front and smashing cardio I never dreamed I would take part in.  Only today I actually entertained a spin bike... I mean what the actual fuck! 20 minutes of cycling at a decent intensity before being put through my paces in the pool!  The support is immense Since starting this journey, I thought people...

So again slightly late with the blog this week, mainly because the usual Wednesday was consumed by work and the preparation for a family camping trip. This trip has been a good thing for me, a time to reflect on the little things in life.... We spent the weekend in our own county, within an hour or so  of our own house. Yet despite being so close to home at times I couldnt have felt further away.  It will sound crazy considering we have an 8 person inflatable tent that cost the price of a small family holiday to benedorm! Electric hook up with LED strip light through out.  It really is home away from home! Yet I type this telling you how at times I felt so far away from my “normal” home life.  Tracking food had gone out the window.. no internet mean’t no myfitnesspal. Dinners were simplistic and easy to cook, feeding 7 people with a two hob electric cooker and a microwave was a blast. However 3am pitch black and needing a wee mean’t my homely luxeries were well and t...

I’ve thought long and hard about this blog, started typing then started over.  I wanted talk about time .... ⏱ It goes so fast, I mean already we are in May.. soon to be June, 3 weeks into the Bali challenge and times not stopping for anyone!  Time is something so precious and yet is something often used as a way out. I’m a prime example of not having enough time, or at least saying I don’t. And I  wanted to break it down... show how my time was spent and how it could be improved, but instead: I want to emphasis on timing..  When things happen and how it affects us... There have been some times in my life when things have been bad.  I hit some serious low points... One thing consistant at all of those times was my support.. my family were amazing, but an unexpected friendship formed at just the right TIME Aaron Aaron is my age, we played in the same rugby team. Aaron was, well different. He was a lads lad and wouldn’t think twice about abusing someone.  He...

Kind of fitting really that my own blog be late and mainly down to my own thoughts and feelings. I was always going to talk about mental health this week inline with mental health week, yet a lapse in mine mean’t to be honest I just wasn’t feeling it!  Since the age of 18 I have worked in roles working with people, many of which have been diagnosed mental health illnesses. Yet this week I felt helpless and useless, and completely unmotivated to do anything.  But now I am here... I’m not really back to a point I would say I am happy.. but with the help of many people (many of which don’t even know they were of any help) I know I am going in the right direction.  Those that helped: Firstly  Alistair Hudson, a fellow JSA member. Alistair put a message in the JSAM group outlining his battles and pointing out that we are on a journey. Life is a journey! Everyones journey has bumps in the road but there is always a final destination. Some strong w...